Most of the Super Friends went to Wild Waves yesterday. It rained and shined on us. I threw up, and then felt better. My feet still hurt. Report cards haven't come, so I can't turn in a copy to the commissary to get a job.

He called Wednesday, and promised to call a few days later. I'm still waiting.

I'd be more enthusiastic about blogging but I just don't feel up to it today.

winamp: The Last of the Famous International Playboys by Morrissey

Ha ha... I'm still not going to see the movie, though. I personally think it's a stupid idea. XP Lame, lame, lame. Now, the Powerfpuff Girls movie, that's something I'm gonna see. =D Something that's worth seeing, at any rate.

...God, I hate my life. I'm so frickin' miserable I could scream.

winamp: Ruined in a Day by New Order

Good Lord. I've found so many variants of the same dish (well, sorta). x_X Here's a few...

Ambrosia Salad

1 cup mixed fruit or fruit, cocktail
1/2 cup Mandarin oranges
1/2 cup pineapple bits
1/2 cup minature marshmallows
3/4 cup sour cream
1/4 cup maraschino cherries, halved
1/4 cup red seedless grapes
lettuce cups, optional

Drain fruits well. Combine all ingredients except lettuce, mixing lightly but throughly. Chill well. Serve in lettuce cups with salad dressing, if desired.

Ambrosia

3 ripe banana's diced
2 cans Mandarin oranges, drained
1 can Pinapple chunk's drained
1/2 cup coconut
2 cup marchmallow's
Cherry's little jar
16 oz Sour cream
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

After mixing this all together garnish with sprinkling a little Cinnamon on top....

Ambrosia

1 fresh coconut
1 can crushed pineapple, with juice
2 apples, chopped
1/2 cup pecans, coarsely broken
5 oranges
1 can fruit cocktail, with juice
2 bananas, sliced
sugar to taste
cherries for garnish

Grate coconut in bowl. Add peeled and sectioned oranges; discard membrane and seeds. Add pineapple, fruit cocktail, apples, bananas, and nuts. Sweeten with sugar, being careful not to add too much as the syrup from the fruit is usually sufficient. Chill before serving. This dessert is pretty garnished with cherries and served in a crystal bowl.

I can't think of which one to use. The second one sounds very familiar, but the third one seems good, too. Gah! If only I could remember... Wait! Something about orange *shudder* Jell-O is coming back to me...

Haiku
Verily I see
That Jell-O is the devil
Of which no man knows

OK, thanks,Poe-san. I had a feeling it was "grawk" but Jenny Marie always refuses to give in and just say she's wrong.

Today I'm going to make ambrosia. I need to find the recipe and buy all of the ingredients, but I know I can. It's really good. I had some when I was down in SoCal a couple summers back, and I can't get it out of my head now. It would be perfect to take along for a picnic or something. Maybe me, Friends A, and Friends B can have a picnic or something on the Fourth of July. That would be nifty.

I did all the social blogs and boring stuff first so that nobody would have to read what I'm gonna post next. It's truly a matter of choice. Just highlight to read.

...I think I'm OK. I mean, it doesn't matter that I acted like an utter fool when he confronted me. He said he would call, but he hasn't. It's making me a nervous wreck. I've been doing a lot of things to keep me busy, surprisingly; video gaming and tennis with the Super Friends, and then laser tag (I got fourth place out of thirteen on my third try!) and basketball with Doug and Matt.... yet I still keep thinking "When I go home there'll be a message for me" or "When I go home Mom/Dad will tell me he called for me"...

As you might have guessed, he hasn't called. I should have known it would have been like this. I took a chance and bared my heart, and look where it got me. Evin says that it was "a gutsy thing to do" and that I shouldn't regret, and that in the future I'll be more likely to take risks, but uh... I don't think so.

So now what am I going to do. I don't know yet. I wrote a very (VERY) long journal entry, pretty much pouring out all my fears and frustrations of the whole matter. It was six pages. Usually I keep the entries down to one or two, but I felt compelled to write about every single major horrible thing that ever happened to me.

Whew. Well, I'd better get ready to go grocery shopping. Before I go, maybe I'll download some really cool techno songs; I heard them at Matt's house yesterday.

winamp: DAN DAN Kokoro Hikareteku by Zard
Eh... I like Field of View's version better.

And before I go...

My friend, Jenny Marie, believes that the word grok is pronounced "groke", as though it rhymes with "smoke" or "bloke." Now, I say that grok is pronounced "grawk", like "talk" or "wok."

I remember it once being the Word of the Day on Useless Knowledge, but I don't remember the pronounciation for it!

Can anyone help?

I've decided to write a letter. If it goes for the best, I will be supremely happy, I should think. If not, well... at least I can take satisfaction in knowing that I denied my shy demeanor and took a risk. I'll probably feel terrible, but it's... a step towards breaking this damnable habit.

No, it's not to the Cute Asian Guy I've been drooling about. I've dismissed him as no more than droolable eye candy. I don't think he could interest me intellectually, as it is. As for this other guy, I'm hoping that... well...

I can't think of anything to say, really, that wouldn't make me sound obsessed and gushy, even though I am quite both. Here's to me not destroying myself over something as simple and as mundane as a crush.

winamp: Smoke by Mr. Ed Jumps The Gun

JOB APPLICATION!

*bops* We're going to go get the job application as soon as m'dad gets home..... I'm so jumped up I can hardly sit still. I really really need this job. Last night I dreamt of the Hyundai Tiburon.... oh man.... I'll admit, I drooled a little. ^^;; If it's possible to love an inanimate object--

Hydro: That's what you said about the GameCube. And the PS2.
Pam: Yes, but--
Hydro: And Dr Pepper.
Pam: ...All right, I get your point, but--
Hydro: Shall I go into more detail? You love plenty of inanimate objects.
Pam: ...

Rephrasing that... If it's possible to be in love with yet another inanimate object, I definitely say it would be the 2003 Hyundai Tiburon. Mmm... isn't it sweet? So.... sweet.....

OK, enough of that. Finals this week. School's out in three days. I'm ecstatic. ^o^ If you couldn't tell.

winamp: Creepin' Up On You by Darren Hayes
I am stalking this car. As of right. Now.

Zzzzzzzz.... *head falls forward*

So... tired. Stupid... response paragraph on Animal Farm... Zzzzzz....

Well, tomorrow is the awards assembly at school, and after school my dad, mom, and I are going to Sylvan to pick me up an application and apply me for my first job. w00t. I'm more than a little nervous, but I should be fine, and I'll most likely get the job. I've decided not to get the second job, BTW, Zeruel. Oddly enough, it was my mom who told me I shouldn't get it, and my dad who should. She says I'll be making plenty of money without the addition of another job, and besides, she thinks I'm too young for something like two jobs (no argument here, really). I just wanted to get a head start on buying my car and saving up for games and stuff... I fell in love with this one car, I think it's a 2003 Hyundai Tiburon.... Man, that thing is Beautiful. It's pretty expensive, though, I think $14,000 to 18,000 price range, if I remember what I saw last night. Still... I'll be making plenty of money, working five days a week (Monday Through Thursday, and Saturday). Hopefully. If I get this job.

I'm so tired.... T___T And lonely, too. I think the loneliness is the reason why I want to sleep so much. Because... I'm not lonely when I sleep. *sigh*

Oh, I forgot to mention... possible trip to China next April, or France two years from now... plus a senior road trip two years from now for us Super Friends, maybe to Yellowstone... Exciting, huh? I'd rather go to China than France, but the trip to China is sooner and means I'd have to raise money faster.... Plus it's not as long as the France trip... ho hum....

winamp: Sleepless Beauty from Gravitation
I don't even watch this anime, so what am I doing with this song?

*dances around* I'm gonna get a job! Evin called up the Sylvan Learning Center for me today, and apparently they always are in need of pullers (people to bring books and such to the teachers), so I called them myself, and asked for Joan (since she was Evin's teacher and he told her about me, etc), but she was busy. I have to call back at 6:30 tonight. *squeals* Having a 4.0, Evin says, can only be a plus. XD

Also, I was considering working at McChord's commissary on the weekends during summer, thus having two jobs. Which means Sylvan's paycheck would go for a car, possibly, and any money I make on the weekends is my own personal spending money. I'm a bit worried about two jobs (and keeping them during the next school year), but as long as I'm out of the house this summer.... XD

My group did excellently on that KGB/Animal Farm presentation today, and I feel good about the Algebra IV test I took. Tomorrow my Biology presentation is due, and I have a test on Animal Farm, but I'm confident I'll do well. ^_^

Ah, I feel... different. Happy, even. :D Why is it that the bad things never seem as bad afterwards than they did before they happened? Oh well... The future's so bright, I gotta wear shades. ^o^

winamp: Mods de Chocobo from FFVIII
Do do do do do do do do.....

Warning: Something that resembles Pamela Philosophy or laughingly impersonates it is going to follow this warning.

The other day I realized that life was like a TV commercial. Commercials are short, sometimes vague, sometimes not. On occasion they might be funny, sometimes just really lame. For those commercials about Zantax or whatever, we have no idea what they're for. People might remember commercials better than the actual programs, and really in life, don't we pay attention to the smaller things, even if we see the bigger picture?

Where this came from, I don't know, but you can be sure that whatever part of my brain spawned it is probably going to be reprimanded harshly by way of pounding it on the desk.

That pretty much concludes this broadcasting day.

*schloop, schloop~~~~~~*

And that, my friends, is the sound of Pamela's brain leaking out of her ears and soaking into the carpet. >_> Sweet nutrients, summer is so close but so far away.

Whew. I orded the FFVII soundtrack and the Fire Emblem VHS. It would have costed less if I had ordered them together, but the soundtrack will take 2-4 weeks to ship, and Michelle's birthday is this Sunday (the 9th). Ordering them separately gives me the Fire Emblem video roughly June 8, which is perfect. ^_^ I'll have to hang around 'til June 28th or so before my soundtrack comes, though. Ah well. When I get more money, I will probably purchase the FFX soundtrack. Because I like the boss fight songs. XD

KGB and snake research both going fairly well, but I will have to dedicate this weekend to working on my Biology display board, and not racing Chocobos. (D'oh.) I'm stuck at the *spoiler* Flux boss in FFX, but I think I know what I shouldn't do against it/them, so I'll try again when I'm feeling particularly self-destructive. ^^;; BTW, I never noticed how tanned Tidus was. o_O;; It's almost... scary.

I'm applying to be an IGNITE Mentor, which basically means I get to corrupt next year's freshmen, if I'm chosen. I hope so; not just because it looks good on college resumés, but because... it will give me a chance to do what I really want to do, and that is change the world. Lacking that, I'll at least (hopefully) be helping someone turn their attitude around about school. Yes, it sounds cheesy, but I like helping people because... I want to do something important or momentous before I die. I don't want to be forgotten. So... maybe by helping others, I can do something that people will remember for a while after my death. I'm hoping so, anyway. Besides, I'm tired of seeing people give up or whine about some problems. Granted, I whine, but dammit I still do the work. :P

Ah... *pats stomach contentedly* Full of spaghetti and Dr Pepper... Life almost seems idyllic. Oh! Did I mention? No, of course not. But yesterday.... I made eye contact with him.... and we shared a smile. XD We had a temp bus driver because our usual one got sick of us, I guess, and he asked if we had to stop at Gray Middle School to pick up some middle schoolers, and he (being my heart's current desire) said jokingly, "No, we don't go to Gray." Then I looked at him, he looked at me, and we smiled at each other. SMILED! XD I know it sounds lame and stupid and gushy but.... I almost feel like life is really good, just as it was before I entered middle school some years ago.... That was a dark period of my life... My friends say I'm acting really stupid and silly when it comes to him, but... I'm glad. Even if I'll never be anything more than another person at the bus stop to him, at least I'll have had that one shining moment.

...Yeah, real stupid, I guess. ^^;; Ah well.

Hehehe. I loved that scene, too. ^_^ 'Cept... now I can't find my copy of Neverwhere. *looks at Hydro* Did we let someone borrow it...? I should really keep a list of the books I lend to people, but I'm so eager to convert them to my kind of reading that I always forget.... -_-;;

Stole this test from Tsua-san...

17

I act like I'm 17.
This test was brought to you by David - Part of the David and James phenomenon. Take it here.

Heh. Big difference, eh? ^_^

I feel as though I should work on something. I've been thinking lately, I should learn how to program. If I'm going to become a video game designer, I'd better have some l33t skills. It won't be easy, but I should at least familiarize myself with programming and stuff. Or maybe I just think too much.

Dangit! I wish I'd been able to take a screencapture, but that just reminded me; when we were playing Super Smash Bros. Melee last Tuesday, Gen-chan, dealt exactly 1337 damage to all enemies. XD What a coinky-dink, neh?

winamp: Happiness Is by Verve Pipe

I'm doing my research on snakes. If anyone has any helpful websites or tips, I'd appreciate it. I've been pretty successful about finding information, but every little bit helps. I have information on infrared detection, but I would really like some more sites on feeding habits and species specifically located in North America. I suppose I could try Google or HotBot again, but HotBot isn't very reliable and Google has too many returns for every search I do for me to possibly sort through it all.

As for everything else, my entire left arm is killing me. It's like a deep ache in my bones, especially around the wrist area. I should take some Advil when I get home. Still have too much time left, though. The time on this laptop is wrong, so it throws me off. Hopefully it won't affect my blog.

YES! Cloud is going to be in the game! Brrrrm CHAKA! *does her Happy Dance* XD

Eat. Spit. Be happy. ^_^

I live! I feel 110% better. Turns out it was probably either 1) the lotion I was using that a friend gave to me as a birthday present or 2) I haven't dusted the thingies on my ceiling fan for a long time. ^^;; I feel a little nauseous but I am much better. Fortunately, it wasn't the Motaba virus, and my internal organs are safe... for now.

On further note, Aeris b!tch-slapped Cloud. XD Brrrmm chaka. I really wasn't aiming for it but hey, I wanted to try something new in the play.

I've decided to go ahead and buy the Fire Emblem VHS for Michelle, and snag me a copy of FFVII's soundtrack. Perhaps that's selfish, but I've wanted it for a very long time, and what good is birthday money if you can't buy something worth buying?

Playing Jak and Daxter today (for the first time in a couple weeks or so) gave me motion sickness. >.< I hate how you can't change the camera view (easily). You have to switch to first person, then rotate the analog around, and it makes me feel funky. FPS-type games aren't my strong suit, though Goldeneye was an exception.

Dang, Zeruel! You're making me look bad here! Okay, so that's not hard to do. You're making me look really bad here, but keep it up anyway! XD

If only I had as much motivation to do homework as I have with playing video games... *has two Finals coming up and has barely researched either topic* We're on Animal Farm in English/History, and my group's topic is the KGB, in both the Russian Revolution and its counterpart in the... fable. XD We really wanted the Great Purge, but another group wanted it as well, and I just didn't feel like arguing (I was sick, really sick).

In Biology, we have to do a final presenation on a group of animals in any kingdom. We're allowed to be in groups of 2-4, but I'm working by myself. Because there's no one in that class period that I'd trust (even a little bit) with my final grade. So, it's researching snakes (!!!) alone. Too bad I have to be general; I really wanted to do more in-depth research, especially on the western diamondback rattlesnake. Oh ho ho hee hee ha ha. ^__^

I should probably do my homework tonight, if not research my final projects. Argh. I'm just bored enough, I might do it. Oh, yes, I got a 90 on my Algebra IV test. ;_; Stupid mistakes by me. Can't afford any more mistakes now. I'm hanging around a 95%. Only 3%, and I'll be looking at an A minus! A minus! Argh! Just saying the accursed phrase makes me shiver in fear.

Oh, and one for the record; my heart is a fiery pit of anger! -_- *glares at Evin* As for the rest of you, it's a long story, mostly involving my intentionally lame attempts at poetry.

I don't know how I'm going to wait for Kingdom Hearts to come out sometime this fall. *sob* Cid Highwind is going to be in it! I can only pray Cloud will make a quick appearance as well. Oh, be still my heart, which is a fiery pit of anger...

Wargh. I need to start looking for a job. -_- I hate growing up. It also wouldn't hurt to blog about something worthwhile, but if you wanted quality entertainment, you could just go watch the Fox Network or something.

winamp: "Gimme Gimme Gimme" by Erasure