quick blog fore i go lie down; this makes me want to cry

All right, I have to banish myself from the computer. My wrist is just aching too badly for me to keep writing. Damn these weak muscles. The last time it was sore, it wasn't this bad. I'll have CTS before I'm outta high school.

Bye, see you in a few weeks or so.

...Really? Wow. It must have been that one time, when I linked to some kinky site that I'd gotten a referral from. @_@ Now that was scary.

*dances madly* Stupid Biology Final! >.< Raar! It took me half the period (each period today was an hour and a half, and there where only three periods) to finish the final. Which is unacceptable. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Although I'm quite sure I aced both my English and Geometry Finals.

I feel bloated today, as though at any given moment someone will come up behind me and poke me, and I'll pop and spew my innards everywhere. I can see it happening, too. I wonder if intestines are really gray? Huh...

winamp: "Strange Hours" by Recoil
That's what he kept, sho 'nuff.

Eeeeee! The February issue of Game Informer came! Super Smash Brothers: Melee got a 9.25! \ (^o^) / Yay! Too bad they took forever to review it, and dish up some secrets, too; I could've used this a couple months back. -_-;;

winamp: "Money For Nothing" by Dire Staits

...and the Nataku image only shows up when you click on another site, then hit Back in your web browser's toolbar. Great.

I can't access any pages beyond Fanfiction.net's main page, I spent two hours working on a wallpaper that looks like crap, I've got writer's block, I can't play my GameCube, my right hand is about to be frostbitten if I don't warm it up soon, my left wrist is making funny noises when I type, my headache won't go away, and my Pikmin idea for the next Vituperation layout has fallen flat on its arse.

Now let's hear you say "Look at the bright side, Pam, today is the first day of the rest of your life!"

-_-#

I've got nothing good to blog about. Wait, make that, I've never had anything good to blog about. That's correct. Probably because my life is more boring than watching grass grow. Unless you happen to be grass, then it's just life. Or something. Argh, I'm not making sense even to myself.

Crap. They better not make The Legend of Zelda into a live action movie (check the poll). There is no one alive worthy to play Link.

It's snowed last night. It actually looks pretty nice. ^_^ If we get heavy snow Sunday night, we might not have school the next day, or at least have late arrival. Which is both good and bad, good because of Finals, and bad because of Finals. If it does snow, it'll really fuck the schedule up. While I'm not object to missing a day or a few hours of school, I really don't want our class times twisted around to make up for a few hours of bliss and schoollessness.

winamp: "Always Have, Always Will" by Ace of Base

My extremities are ice cold, but the rest of me is just fine. Thank you, second hand smoke. >_<

winamp: "Smoke" by Mr. Ed Jumps The Gun

*dances around crazily* Today has been a Good Day™, and hopefully it will continue to be so. I have a big final for a short story due in English tomorrow, but that's OK, because it was assigned today. Argh. :P Plus, I've got Geometry and Histoy to study for; Biology will just be on Chapter 7 (DNA and etc), so I should do good in at least two finals (English and Biology).

My left wrist has been aching lately, probably because I spend so much time writing and rewriting new chapters for my fanfic. ^^;; Some days, it takes an hour to write two pages, and eventually I end up cutting or editing the two pages that I've written. *sighs* I hope I don't scare people away by not being pro Link/Zelda and by having my fanfic be of novel proportions. A novel is considered to be a piece of writing that is over 50,000 words long. My fanfic is around 70,000 words right now, and it's not finished, nor is it the only one in the "series." ...I'm a little scared about dedicating so much of myself to one thing. I mean, when it's finished (I don't like repeating ideas or coming up with lame plots, so this series should be about three/four parts), what will I do? I'll have nothing except for !!The Story!!, but I've always had my side projects....

Poor Hydro. I've been neglecting him.

Anyway, I could just kick myself for signing up for two math classes. I mean, what the hell was I on? >.< Argh.... I took a look at where they're at in Algebra III (and where they'll be in Algebra IV), and it's familiar enough, but... it's f(x) and g(x) and h(x) all over again. Noooooo, functions...... >_< But I have to take it next semester, because they'll have only Integrated Math from next year on. ­¬_¬ Integrated Math. Oh, goody. Oh well, why should it bother me, I'll be in Pre-Cal anyway. Yay. <-- Lack of enthusiasm.

Come on weekend, Pamma needs a brief respite!

winamp: "Ride" by Darren Hayes
XD March 19, 2002. Remember this date.

*cackles evilly* XD XD XD XD XD XD

winamp: "The Battle Rages On" by Deep Purple
Annihilation! KILL THEM ALL! XD XD

I live, though I can't say if that's good or bad quite yet. I did survive the TATU presentation to find out that I got a 102% on my Chapter Five Geometry test. Here's to asking and receiving! And even better, someone likes my fanfic so much that she reviews it pretty much every update. ^_^

Well, after a downloading spree of Ace of Base and Recoil, I feel much better, although a bit trippier. I've never met anyone with a freakier mind than Alan Wilder, though. @_@

winamp: "Breath Control" by Recoil

Fuck. I just wasted two boxes (eight packets) of unflavored gelatin trying to make this damned Phlegm Jar for the TATU presentation tomorrow. Why? Because someone in my stupid family decided to get rid of the instructions I left by the bag of the ingredients. I can only remember that I need two packets of unflavored gelatin and three Junket Rennet tablets, some sugar, and boiled water. So now I have no more gelatin to use for the phlegm jar. It worked minutely, I can see the beginnings of "snot" on the empty coffee jar, but it's not nearly enough to represent the amount of phlegm a smoker with emphysema coughs up in one day.... And I think the gelatin fumes from the hot water made me nauseous.

So now we have no Phlegm Jar. No one is home to go to the store for me, and I doubt like hell my mom will run to the store when she gets homes, and my brother is just a stupid jerk. My dad's at work, and the only other TATU member that I have the phone number of is Gen-chan, who happens to be at Christina's house right now. So even if she had the instructions, it'd not do me good now.

We have to present for 40 minutes class time tomorrow at a middle school, and we have to do about three/four presentations. Which means 120-160 minutes of standing, talking, and smiling until my lips fall off. I have never presented longer than ten minutes, and this will no doubt be the end of me.

I never thought I'd hear myself say this, but I wish it were Finals already. *cries* Why do I dig myself into these holes? Why do I inflict stress and pressure on myself?

Wow, kickin' new layout, Zeruely-kun! I like Gillian-san's new layout too (even if I despise the song >_>)!

All these new layouts make me feel lazy. You people are doing this on purpose; you're getting tired of Kung-Fu Keanu, aren't you? (OK, so I don't know if he really knows kung-fu, but they made fun of his Matrix role on SNL, and it just stuck with me.) I'll have to get a move on that "Pikmin: It's what's for dinner" layout soon enough; as soon as I find time to scan in the cover of the Player's Guide.

You know, I wonder if this song is about drugs. "Come play my game (inhale, inhale), you're the victor! Come play my game (exhale, exhale!)" o__o So it's called "Breathe," but one can't help but wonder.

winamp: "Breathe" by Prodigy

Wow. They love my writing, and so far none of them seem to (outwardly) hate Miyako. That's more important. Furthermore, one of them agrees that Link shouldn't be with Zelda, Malon, Ruto, Sheik, Ganondorf, his horse (XD) because he likes to travel! Yes! YES YES YES!

Ah, I feel ever so much better now. My heart is thumpety-thumping in my chest. I think I know how I'll feel if I sell books. Did I ever tell you how much I love to write? I always thought people wouldn't like my style, because usually right after Link says something profound or curious, he lapses into about three paragraphs of thinking and speculation. >_> I thought that might get boring. I was afraid people would think there wasn't enough action, but so far, no one's complained. Ah well, there'll be plenty of action at the Massharte Ruins. >=D

Did you ever wake up one morning and feel just a little more than crazy? I can't remember if I was awake or asleep last night, but I had the craziest dreams. It could be that I was asleep, but I remember being awake and thinking about my fanfic.

...Today next week I'll be moaning over Finals, which will take place the 28th and the 29th. By then, the TATU presentations will be over. It's almost enough to make me weep. Bad things are cowards, you understand. They don't attack you separately; they gather into hordes and jump at your face, clawing for the eyes.

Yep, they sure do.

winamp: "Insatiable" by Darren Hayes

gen-chan if you read this before i talk to you, i'm not going to the play tomorrow, as i'm going tonight for extra credit in english. i don't need it, but what the hell.

i don't feel like capitalizing things because to do that, i'd need to use my right middle finger, and it's a bit swollen around the nail, so it hurts to type, which means i can't work on the story and i have to finger peck this. i only use my two index and middle fingers, as well as my two thumbs to type, so when one finger goes, it's pretty much worthless to try typing without being annoyed. yeah.

ok, i must go back to work on my map, which is looking much better than the first map. yay.

OH! You people searching for ZELDA FANFICS, feel free to read mine.

(Shameless, but what the hey. XDDD )

Today has been a Good Day™. The Geometry test, I feel extremely confident that I did well on it; I answered all questions without hesitating, and I know the material better than I thought I did. Plus, I think I got the bonus, because it was easy yet worded strangely, so that will definitely help my grade if it turns out OK.

Yes, today is much better, thank you for your regards. (Hope your headache clears soon!) ^__^

I feel like I should be doing homework, but I don't have any, which is strange.... I think I'll work on my map of the world of Hyrule (and more). I just call it that because I have no idea what the name of the actual world is. >_> That creative I am not, and any name I try to give it sounds... stupid. And besides, their world might not have a name, it just might be called "the earth" or "the world."

I think I shall upload more chapters today, even though I still haven't gotten any more reviews (the total number is *drumroll* one!). I don't care if people don't read it any more, and I'm not uncomfortable anymore about having it up. If people want to read it, then fine. If not, *shrug* it's their choice. I've seen some of the fanfics out there that slander the name of fanfiction, but I don't think mine is one of them (even if it's long and takes too long for the plot to "get rolling"). I'm hoping this is going to calm my nerves about having my work "exposed." There's just something about reading other people's work that's really personal, IMHO. It's like a sacred trust, a window into how their mind works. Or maybe I'm just too personal about writing. I love writing; it's a labour of love, but most of the time it doesn't seem like work. In fact... I get uneasy and edgy if I don't write or plot in either !!The Story!! or my fanfic at least once a day. Strange... but stranger things have happened. Like Trevor not wearing his pleather jacket with the flaming ladies in martini glasses.

winamp: "Dragonfly" by smile.dk
Curse you, DDR! XD

I think it's very easy to have low self-esteem when you are absolutely good at nothing. Tomorrow is the Chapter 5 Geometry test, and I am as nervous as can possibly be. I need to get a high A on this test, or I can kiss my 4.0 good-bye. On top of that.... I've just been feeling so ignored and unwanted lately, and it bothers me a lot. *sigh* ~_~

Lord I need your protection... spend some time in my direction....

I hate people. People in general. I don't exclude myself. We are arrogant, self-righteous, stupid morons with snot in our noses and drool on our chins. I hate what people do to each other and the world. I think it would be for the best if a large asteroid or such did hit the earth; that way we won't end up polluting the universe like we have our planet. I think we should all die.

I'm a bit nervous about the whole TATU dealy, since we've finally started getting our act together, but this is ridiculous. The first time we actually met to discuss stuff was on Monday, and that was when he told us that we were going to go and teach some kids at Gray Middle School about TATU. On the 23rd or 25th. That leaves us about a week, week and a half to get ready. Ooh, we are so not ready. >_<;; And if I hear one more TATU/tattoo joke, I think I'll scream.

We have Dr Pepper again. The sad fact is my parents buy Dr Pepper after I've finally gotten over the lack of caffeine. And they always do this. Is this a test? Divine Being help me, I'm sick of it. A few days after the case is gone, I've kicked the habit and can survive a day without a pounding headache. But then, on the fourth or fifth day, what do I see in the garage when I'm taking out trash? Dr Pepper. I swear, it's a form of torture. Jump on the wagon, jump off the wagon. Jump on the wagon, jump off the wagon. I think I'll break a leg somewhere in there.

I feel proud of myself. I've already got a detailed plot outlined for Part Two of my fanfic. Be proud. I may finish posting Part One, and then just leave it at that. I'm not sure if I'll keep my fanfic online, though. I'm still feeling wary about that. By the by, I beat Luigi's Mansion. I was a bit disappointed with the ending, but as always, the techno music rawks. I love the music in that game. Mwahaha.

Am I turning into one of THEM? I hope not. I like my individual freedom. I like my decision not to conform and not to not conform. I like being where I am in life right now. I don't want to end up like THEM, and by which I don't mean the aliens that abduct cows.

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO SOME OF MY CAPTAIN TRACTOR SONGS?! *screams*

My A:/ Drive isn't working. It says that it's "not readily accessible," even though there is a disk in there, all the way. I tried the same with other disks, but it's still not "seeing" it. I bet my brother had something to do with this. When I was on the computer on the 13th, it worked just fine because I used it then. Now, when I come back about two days later, it's not working at all. So this means I'll have to stay on the laptop to work on my fanfic. Oh joy.

It's been a very busy weekend. I feel more tired from the past three days than from the last school week, which is quite sad. Having a somewhat interesting social life is very exhausting. I'm glad I'm not normally social, otherwise there'd be nothing left of me.

Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius was a hilarious movie, but only Chris and Katrina showed up. I guess everyone else got lost and stuff.... >_> I went to the wrong theatre first, but then I realized that the only other theatre with the word "Tacoma" in it was the one right near our house, so we went there and lo! It was the right one. It was a great movie. Kiddish and not realistic, but definitely funny and much better than some other crap movies that have come out.

It was long and difficult, but I finally beat Trouble King 2, with tiny, little Luigi versus Giant, Giant Bowser. Then came Event 51, The Showdown. With Giga Bowser (who looks nothing like Giant Bowser on a Super Mushroom), Mewtwo, and Ganondorf. I got so close to beating it (with Jigglypuff), but then I landed on a bomb and died. ;_; It was Gen-chan who beat it on the fourth(?) try, I think, and it was very close. Thank you, Star Rod and your magical stars.

So now here I am, typing this and trying to put the creativity bolt that struck me to work. I want to work on my Zelda fanfic simply because it's just my little pet, but !!The Story!! is also calling to me. Plus, Hydro's back from his little leave from my brain (while it was deprived of caffeine, as it is not a pleasant place to be unless it's floating in DP).

But alas, no creativity is here to stay, and Geometry whispers its dark little atrocities to me. Plus I am tired beyond belief, even if we went to sleep relatively early. DDRing on caffeine in the wee hours of the morning can take something out of you the next day, even if it was only on Beginner and some sessions you sat out. Oh well.

I don't want to grow up. Because I look at all the adults around me and see how unhappy they are, and I think I will be like them. I do not want to be unhappy, but the sad fact is that the universe never seems to give a fuck what people want. I do not know where this is coming from, but I don't want to grow up. I don't mind my chores or going to school, if I had the guarantee that I would never have to worry about paying the rent or looking for a job. It makes me unhappy to think that I'll have to give up all that thinking time in favor of work and work. Even if a lot of people think it's very strange, I enjoy sitting for hours and simply thinking. That is why it's fairly hard for me to get bored, unless I am addicted to something currently.

I wonder how authors think. I guess I could write to one, but I doubt I'll get a personal reply. More like a "Thank you for writing" sort of thing. Do they constantly sit and imagine things, or do they just.... go about their day not thinking of anything special? Do ideas strike them, or do they have to search for them? It's always been a dream of mine, for as long as I can remember, to be an author, but I just don't have it. Whatever it is, it's someting I'm not possessing. I don't think you can learn it, either.

I know that life after college will not be a cakewalk, but the naive part of me seems to have much success in disillusioning me a lot, so I'm not sure about anything anymore. I want to go to sleep now. That I can be sure of.

I'm terribly sorry to hear about your cat. When I was much younger, our dog named Sam (the second dog we had was called Sam; so was the first; creative...) used to always jump up and steal food out of my hand. Didn't matter what it was, he'd steal it. But then one day he ran away. Our first dog, I wasn't born then, but my dad says he has reason to believe (because he and mom were living in Korea) that our next door neighbor ate him. I kid you not. The guy would get a new dog every three months ("to fatten him/her up" by dad would say), then it would be gone.

It's sad when pets go away or die. They're so much like humans only better.

I finally beat Boolossus (the Boo boss I was complaing about yesterday). The first try today, too. ^^ I was screaming all the profane speech I knew before I won. Then afterwards, more. XD

I'm not very happy, though, because someone in biology stole my eraser while I was extracting DNA from wheat germ, and then tore it. I finally got it back, but... it's not even half of what I had before, and it makes me so angrier. ;_; I loved that eraser; it never smuged and I relied on it a lot. I still do, but it's only a piece.... *sigh* I hate people.

I'm on my dad's computer right now, because I just finished gettin' some treasure in Luigi's Mansion. This game spooks me. Seriously. I hate it when the ghosts bumrush me, because I can only handle maybe two at once. I know you can vacuum more than that at a time, but it gets risky, because they all want to go opposite directions, and to suck them in efficiently, you have to repeatedly tap the Control and C sticks in the opposite direction they're going, so when they all scatter and my Poltergust 3000 picks up three of them, well.... It's not pretty watching Luigi fly all over the room; it's actually quite funny, aside from losing money and health when they drop me. -_-;;

Monday, the bet is on. Bobby says he's going to lose. With an attitude like that, I should collect the money now. Ah well, I'm not in it for the money; I just want someone to have a Smash Fest with. (Yes, I am that desperate.)

winamp: "Rapture (Long Version)" by Blondie
Something about eating cars. XD Then bars.

Gen-chan, you buttmonkey. XD And yes, I know about the package that's arriving. Of course the playlist has to be perfect. I will accept nothing less for Link. XD (The unskinnable bastard.) Raar. I still need to buy you a present, and if I ask what you want, DO NOT SAY CANDLES OR ANYTHING THAT BURNS!!! >:O

Anyway.... ^^

Luigi's Mansion kicks ass. ^^ I don't see how it could be a short game (what with him being as slow as poopy and having to hunt to Hearts to replenish energy), but it's very addicting. I still love going around and pressing the A button and hearing Luigi call out, "Marrrio!" XD It's hard, too! I spent about 30 minutes trying to figure out how to capture the first Portrait Ghost. O_O And now I'm stuck at the Balcony, where all the Boos get together and form one Big Boo, which you have to suck with the Poltergust 3000, then haul over to the frozen unicorn to "pop" it, then freeze as many little Boos as possible before they reform. >_< I died once, and almost died a second time, then I turned it off. But it looks like I won't be able to play it much this weekend, as I'm going to see Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius on Friday with a bunch of friends, and then Gen-chan's birthday is on Saturday. It looks like I just might have a social life. (BTW, I got the Cowboy Bebop movie from the old man, I'll bring it over and we'll watch it together, 'kay?)

Thank you for the comments, but I'm lost on the playlist. ~_~;;

Oh yeah! Bobby is desperate to beat me, and has asked if I would like to wager money on our next smash fest. These are the conditions:
-2 lives each, no items, Hyrule Temple stage, I have to play as Link and he as Marth (our best characters). We must each bet at least two dollars. Winner is the last one standing.
-5 lives each, three preselected items, preselected stage, me as Link and him as Marth. We must each bet at least one dollar. Winner is the last one standing.

I should think I'll win, since I can fight Level 9 Marth in an Bonus match for 8 minutes and only get KO'ed once. ^___^ I'm feeling confident. And I also got the Master Hand Trophy. w00t! I only died three times (with five lives) as Ganondorf fighting through Hard Mode on Classic. All the websites are right; Ganondorf is obscenely strong. o_o;;

I think I just might delete my fanfic and my entire account. It's not that I'm frustrated about not having any readers (well, maybe), but I've just been feeling more and more uncomfortable about having my work up. I think I'm paranoid like that. It's like a part of who I am, and I don't want complete strangers to read my thoughts. I don't know. I'll leave it up a few more days, and if I still feel uneasy about it, I'll delete it.

winamp: "Trancehopper" by II Future
This has been stuck in my head all day long. >_>;;

This is GC writing, my blog is being stupid.

NnM, I can help you on the playlist, it doesn't have to be absolutely perfect. I might as well help you since I did for the main image anyway (which IMO, doesn't look that great). As it is, well, I dunno. It looks cluttered, and a plain playlist might even it out a little. *shrugs* Just a suggestion.

Anyway, I'll get started on a skin as soon as possible, but right now, I'm doing Trig homework. ^____^ Be expecting a package for me going to your house.

cs: "The Great Beyond" by R.E.M.
--- I wanna be sedated! Oops, wrong song.

*pants* BOOYAKA! Take that, you stupid, stupid Crazy Hand! *screams* I killed you, dumm kopf!!!

...Now for Giga Bowser. I'll show him my flamethrower breath. *pours entire bottle of Tabasco Sauce into chili* Bwahahaha.

(Note: This blog may be a bit behind as because Blogger was being a poopy at the time this was written [4:41 PM].)

I simply have to get over squeamishness. The thought of being on a scene with victims whose intestines have been perforated.... *shudders* But I won't be able to help anyone if I'm too busy vomiting off to one side (or maybe *gulp* on the victims). Raar. I took a First AID class and got certified in CPR, but now I remember diddly. Ah well. It won't hurt to take it again.

Oh! Thank you. ^^ Of course I read your blog; I read everything on my list. I know how it feels when it seems like no one reads your blog (or your work, for that matter).

No, it's not late at all, and thank you very much for letting me know. ^^ I'll remember that in the future.

Zoro, Zoro, Zoro. Will we never be free of him? XD (But it looks good anyway; I have a thing for black and white motifs, I don't know why.)

The sad part is, Toad really is that useless. XD I discovered the joys of being Peach and nearly had a nostalgia fit when I (finally) discovered she could "hover" like she could in Super Mario Bros. 2 (when Mario went and saved Subcon, and it all ended up being a dream...). Too bad her moves are fairly weak and she's pretty light; otherwise, she'd be unstoppable. o_o;

Ah, Randy is going to borrow Pikmin from me and I'm going to borrow Luigi's Mansion from him. :D Life is good; this way I'll get to play the game before I buy it, and it won't cost a thing (Pikmin was getting a bit tedious, anyway). Biology was *gasp* actually fun today. We had to use little (cheap) cutouts of DNA nucleotides to build a small portion of a genetic code. XD Mikie got it into his head to build Randy's "perfect girlfriend" but only put two of the pieces together. We ranked on Randy for having only "half a toe" for a girlfriend. I guess it was just one of those things that you just had to be there for. XD Never mind that I only snagged five hours of sleep last night, and never mind that my grades in Geometry are sinking faster than Metal Bowser, it's just instances like those that make a day worth living for.

Raar. FanFiction.Net is down. Again. >.< I was going to post Chapters Seven and Eight, and perhaps revise Chapter Three a little. Ah well; I have plenty of chapters done ahead of time before I have to worry about keeping up with my own writing. >_> Too bad I suck at filler. *sigh*

BTW, I worked on the Link skin some more, and....



The only problem is the playlist. Divine Being help me, I've Fracked Up Royally and now there'll be hell to pay. Gen-chan, would you mind it if I didn't do a playlist for this skin? *is tired of fighting Adobe and Link's unskinnableness* Literally, the playlist is torn between two ideas; making the playlist plain and similar to the thick borders on the main and eqmain, or making it multicoloured and cloudy (difficult, but more flavorful). It's about one third the former idea, one third the latter, and then one third the "filler" playlist. ~_~

There are fries on the counter.... there is caffeine for consumption....

winamp: "(Don't Fear) The Reaper" by Der Fancy Boys
Baby take my hand (Don't fear the reaper) / We'll be able to fly (Don't fear the reaper) / Baby you're my man
[This cover is sung by women, hence the slight change in lyrics. ^^;; ]

A question for Latin buffs: If I wanted to say "destined friendship" in Latin, would the following phrase be correct: fatalis amicitia? Here is where I got it from. Most of the definitions for "destined" seem to be negative, though. >_>

I think it's much easier to write when you're very sure of what to right, so I want to get the rest of the plot down for my fanfic before I do anything. Before, all I had were vague ideas tied by certain events, but filler is the hardest of all to write, IMHO. The Latin ties in somewhere (although I doubt that there would be Latin anywhere in the world of Hyrule and more ^^;; ).

winamp: "DAN DAN Kokoro Hikareteku" by Field of View

You should name the beaches Kling Kilin and Jeki. Jeki Beach. Kling Kilin Beach. I don't know why, but the names make me what to laugh. XD

Just got back from a riled Smash Fest and now I feel ready to write. You know what, I don't give a damn anymore how many people read my fanfic. If it's one or a hundred, I don't care; I'm going to write to please me, and if other people don't like it, then they don't have to read it.

So there! XD

winamp: "Worlds on Fire" by Erasure

*rips hair out* ARGH! It's so much easier to write when you don't have an audience to write for. All right, so there's one person I know of who read it, but an audience of one is still an audience. Of course, what I have posted is only the first six chapters, and I have about eight more complete and ready to post, but.... Dammit, I think I'm using too much dialogue and not enough action. ;_; It's safe to assume that people read fanfiction to read about characters doing things, not talking about doing things. But.... I feel like this fanfic is my dessert, and I want to draw out the flavor of it and make it last as long as possible.

*pulls out more hair and deletes the last two chapters*

There's no feeling in the world quite like sleeping in 'til noon.

....You just milked everything you possibly could from our stories, didn't you? All right, give me the rest of the day, I'm sure I can scrounge up some things from my makeshift map of Hyrule. (I have to redo it, anyway, since the sun can't possibly set in the west and be in the direction of Tophet, as well. Oops.)

You're Yuna. You're hardworking and honest, and also a little naive. You can easily be lied to, but in the end your friends will look out for you. Kind and loving you'd never hurt a fly. You'd be willing to do anything to help others, even if it means some personal sacrafices for you.

Which Final Fantasy X Character would YOU be? Take the test.

I am easily lied to. Yay!

I got a review! XD Someone likes my dialogue. The world is good.

Now I must go and smash various Nintendo characters. I will try and get some [funny] screenshots, if possible, but.... I still think this one is the best. Sheik and Bowser, whoda thunk it? It's just disturbing enough to be hilarious. XD

winamp: "Nitrogen" by II Future
Car commercial!

Raar. >_> I haven't gotten any reviews for my fanfic. I know these things take time, but it's disheartening to find that not a one has reviewed it, even if the review was trashing what I wrote. At least that would mean someone took the time to tell me. ~_~;;

Yeah, the waiting is the hardest part. >_<;;

winamp: "Save Me Darling" by Erasure

....Imood does not have Skeptical, Quizzical, or Disconcerted, which I find a bit annoying.

I don't feel like doing anything right now. I should work on the Link skin. Yes, definitely. divinest Sense Skins hasn't seen an update since last month. I'm just too lazy. Gar. ~_~

Started listening to Styx's "Brave New World" CD again (BTW, Gen-chan, I have your Enigma CD, I'll bring it Monday or when I see you), which was a mortal mistake, since I can't get "Goodbye To Roseland" out of my head, especially the what I like to call "the church hymn bit". Oh well, it's a moving song.

I think the problem with people with low self-esteem is that they often have other problems that tie in with their low thinking, such as being anti-social or never being appreciated enough. It's depressing, but I wonder sometimes if I should ever be confident in what I do.

Blargh. This is started to sound like a diary. Which reminds me, I haven't written in my journal for over... two months now? ~_~ It's such a lovely journal, it is.

winamp: "Jump For Joy!" by 7.1

Random Quote from my Personal Favorites: If God had an agent, the world wouldn't be built yet. It'd only be about Thursday. Jerry Reynolds

I suppose I should let Norton Antivirus run, but I am just tired of having to deal with editing chapters constantly, since FanFiction.Net will only accept certain things and it won't accept HTML code in .doc files, and it certainly doesn't accept italics, bold, or changes in font in .doc files, at least to my knowledge. Murf. How that relates to not letting Antivirus run, I'm not sure. Maybe because my computer stutters enough as it is, and running too many programs just bogs it all down. Zule is like me; likes a lot of tasks but unfortunately, will balk under the weight.

*sniffle* This isn't a love song, but equally sad..... *sigh*

winamp: "What About Me?" by Moving Pictures

Well, I uploaded two chapters of the fanfic on FanFiction.Net, so if you're interested, go here.

I am so setting myself up for the fall. >_<;;

winamp: "Space Cream" by Aura
Fortunately, this song always makes me feel better.

Why is it that whenever I e-mail the webmaster of a site, I never seem to get a reply at all? -_-; And I was really going to send in that fanfiction, too. Ah well, I'll give him a few more days and then go somewhere else. *sigh* On another note, I should be concentrating more on Omino than my own fanfiction. Oops.

That may be so, but I have something to prove to me, and dammit, I'm stubborn like that. ^^;; (Not to mention perfectionist extreme, but we won't go there. -_-# ) I want a 4.0 all four years to prove to myself that I can do it, and I don't really have any other noticeable talents that colleges might like, so extra good grades in honors might give me a bit of a boost. *shakes head* I just haven't found my niche yet, I suppose.

Argh. Homework. Honestly, sometimes I feel that teachers love giving homework right after break to watch you squirm and struggle to write in the longhand. ;_; My hand is rebelling against usage of a pencil. Murf.


Are you a Bitter Hermit?
I AM 50% BITTER HERMIT.

I am a marvel of science. None has ever been discovered like me before, and for that, The Bitter Hermits are grateful. They will be taking membership requests later in the year. Cost is $1,000,000 per year membership and 3 years indentured slavery to each current member. I think it's more than worth it!
Chance I would leave my home voluntarily: ?
Chance I would leave my computer voluntarily: ?

...Well, that was predictable. ^^;;

My God. >_> I will never fight Level 9 Pichu for fun again. Even if it's adorable beyond belief. XD I need to get a life, but eh, I don't really want one. And when I beat All-Star with Young Link (I got the Melee Master Award for not using any recovery items, woohoo!), the ending picture was.... no, not of milk, but of Young Link standing on the broken pillar in Hyrule Temple, and you could see Adult Link from the eyes up in the lower right corner, and I think it was just me, but Adult Link seemed to be in a position that provided an excellent view of up Young Link's... tunic. *cough* Or it could be I'm just a Link lech. XD

...This may sound strange, but can anyone recommend some.... erm... love songs? ^^;;; I'm getting to a romance/angst bit in my fanfic, but being as I am utterly not romantic, I can't think of anything. Give me anything to write about and I probably can, but not romance. I just suck at it. Although Gen-chan says I'm good with gore. Did I mention I'm so squeamish I can't look at a cartoon picture in a First Aid booklet of a guy's guts poking out of his abdomen? Figures. But I don't think I'd ever throw up; usually, if I don't hear something nasty, I'm fine. o_o For some reason, if I hear it, it becomes gross. I don't know why. The picture was just gross because it was... drawn. I don't know why. It looked so cartoony to me, that it made me a little nauseous.

winamp: "Heavy Water" by Styx
On the road to good intentions / Blown to hell by our own inventions

I actually have an account at FanFiction.Net, I'm just wary of subjecting anyone to reading the dragon feces I call my work. ~_~ Let's hear it for low self-esteem. Besides, even if I did want to, I can't log in right now because I keep getting "Page Not Found" errors. It could be Zule being a bitch again, or something's wrong with their server or something.

So I'll look for TLoZ fanfiction the ol'-fashioned way: search engines I'm still working on on TLoZ piece, which is about 60+ pages and not even anywhere near the end of the beginning. >_>;;

Hey, look what the HotBot dragged in. :D Normally I'm a bit cautious about reading other people's work because 90% of the time it's utter crap and unimaginative. I know that sounds completely elitist, and it probably is, but it's also very true, you must admit.

winamp: "Bizzare Love Triangle" by New Order
Every time I see you falling / I get down on my knees and pray / I'm waiting for that final moment

Wow. That's a lot of bonuses I'll never get. "No-Damage Clear" ? >_> Yeah, right. I'll try some of the other ones, though.

If I make a new layout soon, it will probably be somewhere along the lines of a "Pikmin: It's what's for dinner" layout. >:D I am just that.... cruel. (And if I see that idea out there, I'll kill someone.)

Ah.... I did get homework (Geometry, you might've guessed), but at least my history project wasn't as bad as some other people's (and some people didn't even have it done). All right, so that's a mean way of thinking, but it's true. :P The truth doesn't hurt, it's just not what we want to hear sometimes. Or maybe it's the same thing. I don't know.

First day back from school and I found out a got a 79 86 on my math test. Thankfully, I noticed all the right answers that Mr. Bastard--er, Blazey marked wrong. -_-; I'm still not happy with it; my 94% is probably a 92% now. ~_~ *groan* Stupid stupid quiz that I got a D on... *sigh* It ruined everything. I may not get a 4.0 this semester. (And don't I just hear some people cheering.)

Bobby did come over for about an hour, hour and a half, and we played Super Smash Brothers: Melee. :P I, of course, kicked his ass in every aspect of the game. One time, I didn't even have to kill him; he did it for me. XD His ego is badly bruised now, having lost to me so badly that he may never be the same gamer again. And I thought he was tough, going on about how Sean (or is it Shawn?) was great and could kick anyone's arse, and that if he could get close to beating Sean/Shawn, then he'd have no problem with me. If Bobby was that easy, I wonder how much more of a crash Sean/Shawn's ego would make. The higher the pedestal, the greater then fall. >XD Oh, but I go on. I'm not that great, just sneaky, tricky, and despicable. ^_^

Erm... I just think that I would deal better with boys than girls. Don't get me wrong, I think girls are just as good as guys, but quite honestly, I couldn't stand having daughters. Probably because they'd end up nothing like me and everything like the carbon copy of what a girl should be, and that bothers me in an egotistical but understandable way. I really disapprove of the whole "girlie girl" scene, and I know I couldn't force them to be outside of what a girl is expected to be. Like burping. Honestly, people, it's not exclusively male. Gas builds up in everyone's stomach. It may be disgusting coming from a girl, but what makes it better coming from a guy? What, because it's not lady-like? Belching isn't exactly gentleman quality either, you know, so you've no stones to through.

Uh.... I'm sorry if that seemed like a rant at you, Tsua-san, it's just been boiling around in me for a long time. ^^;;;; And actually, I just want one boy, but his name will be Kirby, Ceifeiro, or Raveth.

Honestly, there's just too many girls who are weak. I know I'm weak, physically, but I can't believe how FEEBLE some girls pretend to be or act like it. That's just degrading and it makes me feel like slapping them. Just like guys who can't stand girls who are better at video games than they are. XD

XD Cranium r0xx0rs!

I really should work on the Link skin, but.... *sighs* I just don't feel like it. The skin is doomed to be 1/3 finished.... unless I get a streak of creativity. I'm just afraid of farcking up the playlist. <_<;; As per usual....

winamp: "You Sexy Thing" by Hot Chocolate
God, is this song ever perfect for the character on the skin. XD (Which, surprise surprise, is Link.)

XD *beats the game with Young Link* Got milk? *rolls around laughing*

Erm, sorry. ^^;; It's just hilarious watching the little movie at the end of Classic/Adventure/All-Star. It cuts to about four-five different scenes of Young Link drinking milk. XD That's all his movie is....

I read just something very disturbing on Link, Young Link, and the possiblity of a bed and Barry White songs in the background. '_' But would it be considered cheating? *ponders* That is a very strange case. Some of these people at GameFaqs....

winamp: "Guns in the Sky (Kick Ass Mix)" by INXS
This doesn't sound like INXS....

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH. This year is off to a bad start, despite Mom having won $2,000 yesterday. -_- OK, so it's off to a bad start for me. Blah. Isn't it always?

Well, I am playing Pikmin for the third time, and I plan to beat the game in less than twenty days. And the best part is I hardly need glance at the Player's Guide, I practically have the game memorized. Isn't that so sad? Yes, but I'll stop playing for a long time, then not look at the Player's Guide and try again. Whee.

School tomorrow, and I need only finish the editorial cartoon. Yay. I really don't want to go to school tomorrow, but maybe I can talk Bobby into playing Super Smash Brothers: Melee with me. It gets very boring with only myself, even if I unlocked the Poké Floats stage. ~_~ (And even if Bobby is more annoying than something superly annoying.) I can't believe the school year's nearly half over. It boggles me. And oh crappity, I have to get 200 more pages for required reading. >_< Looks like I'll have to pick up Stranger in a Strange Land (since that was the book I registered). Dang. Plus, two math classes next semester. *tears hair out* What was I thinking? I'm gonna fry like my Pikmin when they get to close to a fire vent. I'll run around screaming then fall to the ground and make high-pitched keening noises and finally die in agony while the Great Master watches on with pity.

o_o Damn, that was depressing. Maybe I should get some screenshots of that. That would be nifty, watching Pikmin fry, don't you think? (Cruel, yes, but at the moment I have nothing better to do. Pikmin are like Sims; they're just more fun to kill than keep alive.) If I'm really bored, perhaps I should just delete everything on Super Smash Brothers: Melee and start over. o_o Erm.... *thinks about the effort she put into getting new characters, stages, and trophies* Or not. >_> God, Roy's Target Test was trying. Really. So was Young Link's. >_<

Murf. >_> I wonder when Star Fox: Adventures on Dinosaur Planet (is that the name?) comes out, if it's not already out? I should go check, it'll give me something to do....

I'll probably come on tomorrow and bemoan the fates of school. So you have a good ol'-fashioned vituperation to look forward to. ^__^

winamp: "The Great Beyond" by R.E.M.

......................Some days, I want to kick God in the balls. Forgive me since that's blasphemy, but quite honestly, I don't like being a girl, especially for a certain period each month. Damn you, menstrual cramps.

I just need to finish the editorial cartoon and one more "bonus" feature of the newspaper (I've decided to do an obituary, I mean, a lot of people died in the Crusades, so it stands to reason that an obituary, if there had been newspapers back then, would be quite long...). Plus, I've got chores if I want to earn some cash to 1) buy Gen-chan a birthday present, and 2) send a belated Christmas present to New York.

I estimate I will be working until 1 PM, then it will be time for Super Smashin' Melee and Pikmin-hurling fun. I've beaten Pikmin twice, but for the life of me can't bring myself to get the "bad" and "neutral" endings. ;_; Olimar is just too adorable to kill or send home with missing pieces.

I've heard you can beat the game in 14 days, getting all 30 pieces. I would have beaten it before 20 days, but my dad wanted his TV back and I didn't want to have to continue from the last save, so I went to Sunset and saved. My bad. :P

I think there is something seriously wrong with my back. I'd like to have it checked out, but I'm afraid it will cost more than my family can safely afford at the moment, so I'll just stick to lying on hard, lumpy objects like cameras and taking Advil.

As you probably figured, the Link skin is on undefinite hiatus until I get over the day-to-day obsession that is GameCube. I could seriously use some more games, though. ;_; I thought I could get by with just two until Eternal Darkness comes out, but.... Super Smash Brothers: Melee isn't fun with just one person and Pikmin gets to be tedious after a while. (Even the Challenge Mode is a bit boring. The days are shorter, I swear, even if the Player's Guide says that they're longer. >_<;; )

...*sigh* Random quote: "A closed mouth gathers no foot." That should be my theme quote. >_< I don't know who said it, just that Neil says it every time I put my foot in my mouth (not literally, but it is beginning to bother me).

winamp: "Pianomania" by 7.1

I'm tired, so dreadfully tired. Tired tired tired. I didn't stay up for New Year's at all. In fact, I forgot about it. Yes. Then my neighbors saw fit to remind me at precisely 12 AM. The only thing I really did to celebrate was have a Dr Pepper, which kept me up more than the fact that it is now 2002.

Thank you, and good night. *falls to the floor with a thump, then crawls off to work on her history project*

winamp: "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" by Wham!
...Or not. A few more hours of sleep seem like Nirvana now....